Hope
It’s all been so much lately. I made this playlist to listen to and help me fall asleep a while back and wrote another one of my playlist accompanying booklets to share with it. Have a listen and or read if interested. Once again, it’s long so you might be better off doing it in sessions or not at all but sharing anyway. Praying for healing family members, country and hearts everywhere. ❤️🙏🏽
Hope Playlist
Orpheus- Sara Bareilles
The moment Sara Bareilles’, Amidst the Chaos was released I started playing it on repeat at our house. I’ve already written about it so many times. I love this album so much, it feels like it’s a part of me. This song is so sad and beautiful and hopeful all at once. I feel like it’s a message we need to hear, to not lose ourselves to the despair of everything that’s been working to pull us further into these dark times. Sara Bareilles has been open about her experiences dealing with depression and issues of self esteem. I am grateful for her generosity and willingness to share, be so honest, vulnerable and in doing so help others. She shared the following about the song Orpheus which includes the line for which the album is named.
“This is one of my favorite songs off the new record, and I took my album title from its lyrics. It is my gentle prayer for the world right now. “Don’t stop trying to find me here amidst the chaos. Though I know it’s blinding there’s a way out. Say out loud: we will not give up on love now.”🙏🏽❤️
To the Mountains- Lizzy McAlpine
Did you take a mini trip to get away from your four walls during the pandemic? I’ve seen lots of posts with beautiful getaways to the mountains, desert, lakes. We were able to take a few trips to the mountains and reset. Once the beaches and then canyons closed life felt suddenly all the more claustrophobic. So understandable that the playgrounds would be closed but some of the other outdoor spaces were definitely harder to say a temporary goodbye to. Feet in a cold river, walks down winding, wooded trails, and yes hugging trees are all scientifically proven to be healing and therapeutic. Unplugging and saving the pretty pictures for a future post instead of the instant share is a good idea sometimes. Mother Nature is a sure fire remedy for the quarantine life blues. Go outside and fill that prescription.
Weather the Storm- Benjamin Scheuer
This song is from a beautiful musical, The Lion. Written and performed by Benjamin Scheuer, it’s like a memoir played out on stage with stories told in song and strings. Definitely recommend this show to anyone who is a lover of storytelling and music. The night I watched this was a night that Conor was right at my side and as the show was progressing I decided that the themes might be too heavy for him as the performer was speaking of a parent struggling with mental illness and I wasn’t sure the outcome of the story, so I decided it was time for Conor to go to bed. He was disappointed because he loved the music and the story about the siblings as lions. I remember thinking the song was actually so fitting. During the extra time at home, I felt I could no longer use the usual excuse of “not enough time” to keep pushing back so many unfinished or even non started projects. After the panic, stress eating, binge Netflix sessions etc had subsided it was time to organize kitchen cabinets, linen closets and finally finish redecorating “the Littles’” room. This poor room had been bare walled and undone with a well laid out plan patiently waiting forever. I had collected (more like hoarded) artwork, bedding, crafting supplies, little memory trinkets, you name it all for the perfect day to arrive which would set forth the room refresh. This day might as well have been scheduled to land on the specific zodiac alignment with the mystical moon phase, kids are distracted and safely out of way, mommy is rested and creatively energized, rest of house is fully clean and organized, unicorns are flying over the double rainbow strategically arched over our house as they fart glitter in the yard kind of days but somehow after a few months of these apocalyptic and crazy times all was still and calm enough to get to it. Finally the room was pretty much done and the Littles LOVED IT!! They all love animals so much and we had chosen long ago to do African animals with souvenirs collected from world travels (not necessarily our travels, mostly of their abuelos.) Each child’s bed had a painted canvas hanging above it with an animal of their choice. Lucia, an elephant. Elephants are very special in our family, this made her feel lucky to have gotten the elephant. Grace got the giraffe. When we first got the bedding many years earlier, hers had giraffe decorative pillows and she had gotten quite used to the giraffes in her bed, perfect. Conor’s original bedding had a lion pillow so he said he wanted the lion artwork. We kept calling him the lion and he loved it. His Godfather before him had been known to perform epic Cowardly Lion monologues on very special occasions or if the mood was just right. We try and live by his example and be brave and stand tall when we can but also teach the kids that no person is perfect and we will all fall from time to time and make mistakes but it’s how you get back up again that really defines you. So blessed that we had Uncle Johnny to teach us so many important lessons. Unlike the lion’s pride, we are blessed to have many amazing male role models in our son’s and daughters’ lives. I can imagine them sending us the message in this song. Whether from heaven, a zoom call or a masked up six feet apart chat, family is the pride, the love, the help that we give and receive. May your little cubs be blessed with lions like ours.
** oh yeah, and shortly after the completion of said room the oldest cub moved out of the den and off to college so the little lion, Conor moved into her old room and we had to move everything around again. It’s ok, I’m fine.
Summer, Highland Falls- Billy Joel
As mentioned previously, our children are beyond blessed when it comes to supportive and loving family members. I didn’t exactly include their father in that group because his influence is immeasurable and deserves its own novel. Hopefully if you read this and you are a parent you feel your partner is the very best you could have chosen for your children. Brian is beyond a shadow of a doubt the best father my children could ever dreamed of having. He spends endless amounts of meaningful, fun, quality time with them and loves every second. He is my rock and I have needed him and leaned on him so much more these past few weeks. I try and be strong for him as well because I know sometimes he needs that too but I find it hard to imagine I can compare. Very recently it was actually my turn to be the tougher one for him but boy, how quickly the tower topples sometimes. We joke about how thankfully it seems we aren’t both overwhelmed at the same time or going through our low points together. All about balance, I guess. Sadness, euphoria, yin and yang, drive each other crazy and then laugh ourselves silly. No matter the mood though there’s always a Billy Joel song for us to play.
Rainbow- Kacey Musgraves
As hard as these times have been, I fortunately can’t imagine the most terrible pain of someone who has ever considered ending their life. I have however been on the other end of the call. I obviously can’t go into detail about this because of the very personal and private nature but I can say how important it is to pay attention to loved ones that are struggling. Unfortunately this pandemic is causing an understandable rise in mental health problems and possibly impacting the already pre pandemic rising number of suicides.
This past May The Senate passed a bipartisan bill to designate a three digit number as a suicide hotline. 988 is not yet active and hopes to be up and running by July 2022 but If you know of someone who is struggling and may be in need of serious help please save this information or research now for resources and save in your phone to be prepared.
https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/
“If you could see what I see you’d be blinded by the colors...”
Cry On My Shoulder-Bonnie Raitt
Sometimes when going through hard times we seek the support of a friend. Sometimes we’re that friend that answered the call or knew to reach out. “Cry On My Shoulder” is that message to a loved one set to music.
When you love music as much as I do it can be difficult to name a top 10 list of favorite artists. There are so many amazing talents, not to mention different genres to categorize them in. Though this may be true, Bonnie Raitt is definitely on my most favorites list. My love for her started with Nick of Time and Luck of the Draw and continued to grow with each new album and of course the deeper dives into her earlier music. Whether she wrote the song, covered the song like the ever popular version of John Prine’s “Angel From Montgomery”, wrote the song that was later covered like “Give It Up or Let Me Go” by The Chicks, or a huge hit like “I Can’t Make You Love Me” that had many follow up covers by different artists, most notably for this fan the version by George Michael. Any combination of these is certain to play throughout our home weekly, whether singing along to a long list of favorite love songs or dancing silly style to “Gnawin’ on It”, these walls are familiar with her voice and guitar riffs.
Raitt has been open about the obstacles she’s had to overcome to get to where she is now. Controlling her narrative and avoiding the far too familiar story of a rocker taken down by addiction. Thankfully she is still gracing us with amazing music. Raitt’ s new album, Just Like That…, is a welcome addition to her discography after her six year absence of new music.
Dear Hope- Brittany O’Grady
This song was written by Sara Bareilles for her show, Little Voice, which is currently available for binging on Apple TV+. This version is from the original series soundtrack and is performed by the show’s lead actress, Brittany O’Grady. O’Grady plays Bess King a singer songwriter in pre-COVID New York, who also tends bar, walks dogs, and juggles many heavy family responsibilities. This show is beautiful. I love the characters, the scenery, cinematography, storylines, everything. JJ Abrams and Sara Bareilles have brought this gem of a show to us, it’s loosely based on Bareilles’ life stories and it’s making me feel nostalgic about my first JJ Abrams girl in big NYC show, Felicity. I so loved that show too. My favorite scenes though have to be (aside from the train bar scene where Bess sings Simple and True, wow!! Oh, and the video shoot for More Love and, and... seriously check out this show!) the ones with Bess’ older brother Louie. Kevin Valdez plays my favorite character, Louie. Louie, like the actor who plays him is on the autism spectrum and his performance is moving. Louie’s love of all things Broadway theatre make this theatre geek so happy. The inclusion of a neuro-diverse actor and character make me happy as well. Speaking of inclusion, there’s no shortage of diversity in this cast, it just feels like real life and that’s refreshing.
The title of the show is named after a song Bareilles wrote for her first album but was in the end rejected and used instead as only the title of the album. All these years later the song is now the title track of a wonderful show, so inspiring. Sara didn’t give up on her song and this song, Dear Hope makes me feel the same. I’ve listened to this song many nights when I had trouble falling asleep, actually that is how I came up with making this playlist. It is so relaxing and relatable during these times. Sometimes we wish we would get thrown a rope. Hang in there.
More Love- Sara Bareilles
More Love is the title track of Bareilles’ surprise gift to her fans. On this album we get to hear ten of the Little Voice series songs in Sara’s voice. I love that she has done this again as she did with the Waitress Musical soundtrack. I switch back and forth between the albums and never get bored.
On September 18 Maya and I were out together and upon getting back into the car in between the last of our errands, I checked my phone and saw the text from my mom that Ruth Bader Ginsburg had just died along with the words, “so sorry”. I gasped loudly and scared Maya. We have received so many bad news calls and texts lately that she was scared something had happened to a family member. Then when I shared the devastating news, it really felt just as sad. We listened to this playlist as we drove and shared quiet tears. For a few minutes I felt I might need to pull over because the sadness morphed into fear and made me feel intense nausea.
This song is all about standing up for yourself and sometimes standing up for yourself means standing up for others. This song made me think of RBG, with the line, “Do you know what you fight for?”. I had ordered a sticker a few months back with RBG’s face and the words, “Fight for the Things You Care About”. You’ve probably seen the shirts or profile pics. For that reason and the fact that the song reminds me of a young Ginsburg balancing so much to break barriers for herself and everyone to come after. Thank you RBG, May you Rest In Peace.
Love’s In Need of Love Today- Stevie Wonder
Reach out to your loved ones. During these times we are especially missing the physical connection with so many of our loved ones. Many of us have already given up on the zooms and house party app type gatherings. Some of us have been lucky to find a bubble family to spend some safe time with but still, there’s no substitute for big, loud, happy, hug fest parties with shared food and dancing that we are hopefully used to. So many people have moved away from real calls to text but a good old fashioned phone call is especially important right now. I guess, I could have chosen another popular Stevie Wonder song... No seriously, an aunt of mine and I were talking on the phone recently and at the end of our conversation we both talked about how nice it was and even though I called her to check in because there were so many hard things going on for her we were able to laugh as well in between some shared tears. Reach out to someone even if you are afraid to interrupt. Reach out to someone for help even if you are afraid they’re too busy. Someone else I love told me about a call for a favor they received and how helping someone else that needed a ride for groceries actually helped them by getting them out and away from all the sad news and overwhelming stories everywhere. If it’s something you can do safely, with masks and/or space, helping others usually helps us in return.
“Don’t delay send yours in right away” OR... just call to say, “I love you!” 😉
3 Things- Jason Mraz
Mraz is so positive, I love his music and his messages. It’s important to feel all the feelings. After the extra hard and low dips we are facing hopefully we can pull ourselves up and focus on the positives in our lives and get back into the fight of life. I have started a weekly one on date with each child, walking to focus on my health, and getting back into action on activism especially to focus on volunteering for elections. Those are my 3 positive things that I will commit to do for myself. What 3 things can you start or get back into for yourself?
Amor Eterno (En Vivo)- La Santa Cecilia
Written by Alberto Aguilera Valadez this song has had many beautiful voices sing it’s painful but beautiful lyrics over the years. I’ve written about this song before and how much of a staple it is in my family. Growing up I usually heard versions sung by Vicente Fernandez, Juan Gabriel, and of course Rocío Dúrcal but at any given family gathering if we played this song it wasn’t their voices I heard it was ours. Mostly my Papi and Tio Hugo’s and we were singing about their mother, my Tita. I miss her so much still but am glad she didn’t have to see this time we are living. I miss my huge family huddled up and hugging. I miss concerts. I’ve been lucky to see this song performed by this band live a few times now and the last time was with my daughter Isabel. Isabel is now in Ireland and I miss her most. It’s ok, because I’m so happy and excited for her so at least that feeling is bittersweet. Missing the family is less sweet but I guess I can focus on the fact that I’m lucky to have a beautiful, united family to miss. The reunion will be epic.
Cuando Salí de Cuba- Celia Cruz
Speaking of missing my Tita and being grateful she didn’t have to endure these times. I also miss my Abuela Dulce. Saying that I’m glad they didn’t have to be here for all this is kind of funny because of course we know that the generations before us faced so many terrible hardships of their own, some far worse and some many more times. If we had the chance to know them, they were lucky to have survived and overcome. So grateful for the times I had listened to their stories. Some sad, some beautiful, some hilarious but all part of our own stories we inherited. I try to hold onto their memories and love. My mom still visits their grave sites on each birthday, anniversary and whenever she feels like a visit. I talk to them from wherever I am and talk about them to my children and hope to take them all to their birth countries some day. Cuba and Honduras (for the second time) are definitely places I would like to make plans to travel to once possible. Where would you like to travel to once the world goes right again?
Live Your Life (Live)-
Nick Cordero
I wrote about Nick a few times before. Once was when obsessing about Waitress The Musical, he originated the role of the emotionally abusive husband Earl. Next time I wrote about him was with a heavy heart. Nick contracted COVID-19 and after 95 heartbreaking days of fighting he lost his his battle at the young age of 41. Our family followed his story through his wife, Amanda Kloot’s Instagram page and we participated in the daily playing of this song and the kids were even shared on her story singing and dancing along. Amanda has been such a wonderful example of hope, positivity, grace and love and gratitude. Alongside their baby boy, Elvis the world joined them in community and encouragement. I highly recommend you follow her on Instagram for endless positive vibes and adorable Elvis and his musical mornings. Amanda is continuing with her business as a fitness expert and making her and Nick’s dream house in Laurel Canyon a happy home that is filled with love and Nick’s presence everywhere.
Gone At Last-
Paul Simon with Phoebe Snow
I remember before Covid hit, I had a streak of what most would call bad luck. It was so frustrating but I remember saying to myself it wasn’t bad luck at all, it was me not taking enough time. I had to be honest with myself and admit that I needed to slow down, organize, breathe and be more mindful. So many times we try and blame things on bad luck instead of being real with ourselves. Once I admitted that I had to re-evaluate my actions, things started running much smoother. I know that I’ll have to remind myself again some time in the future but probably less and less over time. Brian is teaching a comparative religion class and asked a family member to zoom in for a presentation. The cousin is a Zen Buddhist Priest and he worked with the students on breathing techniques for meditation. The straw breathing technique was a real hit with Brian and we’ve been focusing on mindfulness and breathing for the whole family. During these times especially, meditation, prayer, breathing, stretching and exercise are all more important than ever. Hopefully we can sing out loud that this ordeal is ‘gone at last’ sooner than later but even then these will be useful tools .
I Knew You Were Waiting (For Me)-
George Michael & Aretha Franklin
My love, George and the amazing Aretha! How I love this song and listen to it to get me in a good mood. When Aretha passed, I thought of them reuniting in heaven. I keep wondering when this will all be over. Sometimes it feels like it must be a terrible curse on the calendar year. Could it possibly be over when the clock strikes midnight on December 31st into the first of January, 2021? Will it be over after the election if Joe Biden is elected? That would be a great start anyway knowing so many of these issues could have been prevented and/or at least not let to get so out of control. Pandemic, fires, racial injustice that lead to protest or riots, all of it. So looking forward to the good that is waiting for us once this nightmare is over.
